24 September

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I’ve never gotten the jobs I want. I don’t even dare to think about it because it’s sad to fail. I’m 42 I’m still after a job that I just want to do unconditionally. A job that I feel I’m good at it, I bring values.

If I get a job that I had an interview today, how long will it keep me happy?

It seems to be a job I want and I believe I can offer my experience to help the organization to grow and there is room for me to develop. And, I return to an industry that all these years I long for.

This time, just this time, can I get it? Even though it will be a cost of others. It might not be a cost on others if I don’t get an offer. Then, I just continue living my life as I used to do it. It’s not bad. I should get used to it. That was my life and it might be my life.

But, I hope not 🙁. I hope for a different result this time, just this time.

When shit has happened

There is nothing much to do when shit happens. Then just facing it and slowly cleaning it bit by bit. This way shit can be removed.

Dream

I always envious people with artistic, creative sense. I’m looking for my own inspiration on Morpheus, the lord of dreams.

Listening to an audiobook, the Sandman. I get fixated to Dream of my own. It is stuck in my head somewhere. I have a feeling but I can’t see his face.

He’s still in my dreams.

The very first of my own production

It’s my first time to capture what I see on paper. They are in sequence.

Sofia was eating roasted bread, a glass of milk, parasols and standing Sofia
A neighbor from the backyard
On the backyard (version 1)

I continued working on version 1 after I had taken a picture of it, it looked empty.

On the backyard (final version)
It feels like I was screaming YES YES YES!!!